10 Ways to Snap a Bad Mood

10 Ways to Snap a Bad Mood

How to protect your psychological health, improve your relationships, and enhance your self-esteem.

by Guy Winch, Ph.D.

Knowing the cause makes all the difference.

Published on September 29, 2014 by Guy Winch, Ph.D. in The Squeaky Wheel

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We all get bad moods and we eventually snap out of them. The main reason we have trouble extracting ourselves from them more immediately is because you can't shake a bad mood if you're not aware of what's causing it. The next time you get into a funk, don't simply wait for your dark cloud to lift. There are steps you can take to improve a bad mood and the first one is to figure out what’s causing it. Here are ten common causes of bad moods and what you can do to banish them.

1. Feeling guilty. Feeling even mildly guilty can have a huge impact on our mood. Forgetting someone’s birthday can make you feel bad even if you apologize (and certainly if you don’t). The best way to resolve guilty feelings is to atone for your actions. If you still feel bad about the missed birthday—take a few minutes to send a cute/funny apology card/e-card or small gift. They will appreciate the gesture and you will feel better by the time you click send (read The Five Ingredients of an Effective Apology).

2. Small rejections. Rejections are an extremely common emotional injury, especially in the age of social media (read Why Rejections on Social Media Can Really Hurt). When you post your vacation pictures on Facebook or Instagram and no one likes them, it can sting. However, since you don’t know the circumstances, it’s important not to take things personally. People often check social media on the fly; while waiting for the elevator (or the doctor), while stuck at a traffic light (or in a meeting), or while sitting on a bus (or on the can). If someone close hasn’t responded, assume they were too busy to do so, send them a text or message asking them to take a look at your vacation pics and get the response you want.

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3. Outstanding tasks. Our mental to-do lists can sit in the back of our mind, nag at us, and bring down our mood. But you don’t have to complete every outstanding task to improve your mood. Studies found that making a plan for tackling such tasks is sufficient to eliminate the mental nagging and improve your mood. So decide when you’ll do the task, set a reminder on your phone or put up a post-it, and see your mood lighten.
4. Brooding over upsetting events. Many of us can get stuck replaying upsetting scenes that occurred days, weeks, and even months ago (read The Seven Hidden Dangers of Brooding). When an upsetting short film keeps playing in the back of your mind—use distraction techniques to reduce the intensity and frequency of the reminder. Studies show that even a two minute distraction (such as doing a crossword, Candy Crush, or Sudoku) is sufficient to disrupt the distressing thought and repair your mood.

5. Having a low self-esteem day. Like having a bad hair day, we often wake up feeling crappy about ourselves for no apparent reason. Our self-esteem tends to fluctuate but it is also important to beef it up when it is low. Therefore, when your self-esteem is in a slump for no apparent reason, do something to make you feel good about yourself. Work out and release some endorphins, wear something you feel good in, plan something you’ll look forward to doing, or call someone who truly appreciates you and makes you feel good about who you are.

6. Fearing failure. We can worry about a triathlon or sporting event, a big presentation at work, or an important exam for days and even weeks beforehand. To get out of your bad mood, focus on things in your control: Beefing up your preparation, creating support among colleagues by being supportive and encouraging of their presentations (making them more likely to be supportive of yours), or making a detailed study schedule can help reduce fear of failure and the bad moods that go with it.

7. Feeling disconnected from people. We can often get so caught up in life we neglect our emotional and social needs and begin to feel disconnected from the people around us. Give a loved one a call or take a break and play with your pet (cats and dogs are best for easing feelings of loneliness. Alas, there is little science about other species, so apologies to the pet goldfish, parrot, and snake folk). Studies have also found that even brief social interactions with acquaintances can improve mood (read Why We Need All the Acquaintances We Can Get).

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8. Getting caught up in small annoyances. As we go about our busy lives, small annoyances such as getting incorrect charges on a phone bill, cable service going on the fritz, or the car not starting can become exaggerated and ruin our mood. To restore your mood you need to get perspective and reminding yourself of the big picture. Use the one year question: Is this something you will remember in a year? If not, it’s not worth getting annoyed about. To help balance your mood even further, do a quick gratitude exercise. Make a list of 5 things you’re grateful for that really matter (e.g., Your kids are healthy, you have a good job, you have friends who care about you, your standard of living is better than most other people in the world, etc…).

9. Being hungry. Okay, this one is pretty obvious but it’s amazing how often we forget to consider it. Being hungry impacts our mood far more than we tend to realize. If it’s been a while since you last ate—try a snack.

10. Being tired. This one too is in the ‘obvious but often neglected’ category. Children aren’t the only ones who get cranky when they’re tired. When we don’t get enough sleep it significantly impacts our thinking, creativity, and especially our general mood. If you can, take a fifteen minute powernap. Even a brief nap can be sufficient to recharge your batteries and bump you out of the doldrums.

source: shared article

www.psychologytoday.com, date accessed 30 September 2014